In love with the world

Jantar Mantar in Jaipur, the world's largest sundial - built in the 18th C

Today my class more or less did their first science experiment. It had to do with time. We made our own clocks - using water and candles and while these were going on, i asked them to think about how they would make their own clocks. They more or less came up with the pendulum and the hour glass. It was so lovely to see them completely engaged with essentially inventing something. They worked in teams and discussed with each other what they would do. It was very sweet watching them actually. And then it was also great getting the the faults in the various ways of measuring time to show up as well - like someone forgot to keep an eye on the water clock so they didn't know what time the clock stopped dripping. When i asked, did you see what time it stopped, the person in question said, i have NO idea. So i said, this was the problem with the water clock. In Rome they had servants who used to look after the clock and if someone forgot to do it, they would have to go back to the town centre to get the time off the sundial there.

When Main Lesson ended some children were still thinking about the problem and trying to come up with solutions. This is what being in love with the world is like, i thought to myself. Let us never forget it. How everything is possible.

Ghin is back in feeling sick land. Poor thing. I really hope it isn't worse than a virus. He is such a sweet child. Oisin too. I practised piano with Oisin today. I was going through the scales with him. This is my phlegmatic temperament betraying itself. I told him i loved doing my scales. Why he asked me, they are soooo boring. I said, no, i just loved them, i don't know why. I could have played them all day and all night. Thanks to this slight OCDness about me, i now only have to place my fingers on any key and the muscle memory comes back about which sharps and flats need to be played. It is kind of like a mini superpower. And if i forget what sharps and flats belong to which minor, all i have to do is imagine myself playing the piano and viola!

I really wish i played the piano more.

It has been a weird January. I feel like it never really took off because of the illness from the boys. Winter has also finally decided to arrive. With winter come the irrational complaints that people have about the bad weather. If you are sleeping rough and have no heating of course winter is shit. In fact it is terrible. But by and large, what do we expect, it is WINTER. I am quite bored of Facebook now. I go on it a couple of times a day, but i sort of share stuff less and less now. I spend more time reading and doing the blog when it comes to social media. I have never understood the point of tweeting, although i gather this is how most of the world now communicates.

Most of people's social media communication tends to be banal - this includes my own. This is because at the end of the day the social media platform is precisely that - it is a fairly superficial expression of what people think their lives are. Which is fine - i mean what else can we expect it to be, unless we are using it as a campaigning tool. We don't campaign for our lives right? So yes, of course it is going to be banal and superficial. We aren't going to share our deepest saddest truths online. So, what choice do we then have? This makes FB then very samey. I think it is GREAT for getting weird new ideas. I love it for that. But being with real people is much better. Which reminds me i must contact a few real people and set up dinner dates.

I am hoping the snow will lie. Cos it would be fantastic to get a snow day.

Thinking about the piano a bit more. I have always believed that i am a terrible piano player and now when i look back i think actually i was ok. I had no help at all from my family and had to learn to play the piano on my own at home. I mean i had piano lessons, but the support that Oisin and Ghin have from me, none. Given that, i did manage to do quite well but for some reason i was convinced that i was a shit piano player. Why is this? Weird.

Hmmmm....

There is now a lovely, quiet contentment that has more or less enfolded my life. I have to attribute this to the variety of things we get to do daily with the children and with incredibly talented and dedicated people everyday - as well as all the love and support i have received from all those around me. Later on today, i will play the piano in the morning, i will make a simple breakfast of bacon and eggs with some toast and fresh coffee. I will later on reread the next passage about Abram and try to remember that. I will then get ready to make cupcakes with twelve children, instead of garden. During the course of the day we will draw, paint, count, experiment, cook and then we will have a college meeting about child study. Then i get to my first horseriding class of the year. To use every single bit of myself. What a gift this is. If i had a wish for anyone, including my sons, it would be that they have the choice to use very bit of themselves every single day in doing what they love the most. THAT is the ultimate luxury, to be at home with yourself. To enjoy your own company.

Of course there will be sorrows and disappointments along the way, but i think that if we experience this in the course of doing what it is that we want in a self-determined fashion, then we end up learning from these experiences. The best mistakes are the one you make for yourself. And i have learnt to love my mistakes. In fact, i look forward to making mistakes. They are funny when we mess up. Today during the experiments, the children told me, Stephanie, this one didn't really work out. I said, that's ok, i said. Things usually don't work out the first time, but all you need to do is try again. Maybe try something different. With a bigger stone, or with a shorter string. Don't give up, that is how we learn... to be in love with the world.