Shiva's and Metta's Mother's Sutra

In the past week, there have been two occasions where I have been able to, as it were, return to the what used to be and realise how glad I have been to move on. I had been for the longest time thinking about what it might have been like if I stayed and I had my question answered. I am glad that I left. It would have been more of the same madness and things would have just continued with the madness. He is living in the cursed timeline was something which has stayed with me. Sometimes things happen and the quote just sticks. It is good that it is no longer the Earth with witnesses me. It is also others. And then I visited a place yesterday near by and saw that whew, I'm glad I left too. It's just more of the same and I am not doing what I should and I would have stayed and been with people who were trying their best but really.... And I could not have done what I do now. And I have now carved this great little place for myself.  I...

This isn't Oisin's first public speaking engagement, but it is his first outing as a Venture Capital firm. He is talking about what VCs look for in Asian Tech start ups and honestly I could not be prouder.  My wee baby has marked yet another milestone. Public speaking at the age of 22 in front of a cold audience. It could not be harder and he did a great job of it. Well done le babe.

When I look back on how I am different in my first round of Steiner teaching... the years of teaching have given me so much. For a start, I know that if I had been given THIS class then, I would have been completely at a loss.  I had been given so much poor advice in the teacher training course. For a start, there was this over emphasis on all this form and ritual. I realise that now. It was a load of bollocks. Free rendering was not done in a way which was effective for us. There was also a very much hope and pray version of how children learnt. There wasn't enough teaching inserted into the process. I was asked to hold back on my will and asserting my will in all the wrong places and then given all this nonsensical advise about morning verses and four seasons, etc. Yes, these have their place, but... also all the nonsense about all these cutesy vacationy highly exhausting activities like Class Trips to exotic places. It was mad. Would I bring my class to London agai...

The source of the Lagan Everything must have a beginning Mystical presence This used to be beneath the sea The Raven called Two days ago I finally made it to Sliabh Cruib. I couldnt see the fabled view because of the mist, but it made me turn inwards. It made me realise how much I loved being older, loved being alone, loved the solitude. Loved the way in which I was able to just get on with it. To not have the agony of the people around me and the expectations. It has been ten long but not so long days. At this time of the year, the days all start to merge together, the same way the nights merge together in the winter. Oisin has had a wonderful time in Singapore. He is hoping to return there. What were my greatest fears for my sons? That somehow they would feel that they were lesser and that they would felt they never belonged. The original sin. And so I made sure that they did not have to face all that unnecessary doubt at a time in thei...

Saturday at the Quarries.... working with Fostering Network The front lawn Working with nettles Making nettle soup New Moon Goddess Journeying Carding nettles At the Linen Museum Over the past week it has been hectic. I've been walking around in a haze. As usual it is mostly because of Gaza. I still cannot get my head around the horror this world has become. We have Zionists now yelling like crazed lunatics about slaughtering people.  Here's a great compliation of the mess we are in, especially the United States... https://www.youtube.com/live/sW1h746FH1g?si=OivE3KPOjh6PJAYS I have now seen complete idiots who are in positions of power - who have clearly just gotten there by agreeing with the people at the top. This is how cloning takes place in real lift. Have a person devoid of a brain cell and get them to just repeat shite. And praise them for it. I literally cannot be doing with...

I am so delighted to see May again. My god that was a brutal spring. Just relentless rain. And so fucking cold. Now we are back into summer once more and the warmth is such a relief. I saw Ghin today and he told me what he had said about the weaponsing of children. I was did you really say that? He was yeah, totally. It was really bang out of order he said. My son. Thank you my son. I tried to watch Fool Me Once and I was completely bored. But I was also trying to take it easy. My cough is no better and my voice is still very sore. Anyway, I'm off to bed. I had seafood chowder again. I rewatched the Triangle of Sadness  and fell asleep. It is such a good film. It was better on the second watching. Which is how you know a film is good.

Harland and Wolff Yesterday was the maypole. It was such a success. The kids did brilliantly and we nailed single weaving. Again. For the second year in the row. There was a tiny tangle only right at the end. We were very lucky. My voice is useless now and I spend the entire afternoon and night coughing. On the bright side, the entire front lawn, this is the thre year of wildflowering and it is now pure species rich grassland. There are plantago, dandelions, yellow rattle, yarrow, margeurite, clover, welsh poppy, and the list goes on. I am over the moon.  It is well and truly May now. It is well and truly the summer. I am actually still exhausted from last week and the massive physical exertions of the week. There's loads to do today as well actually. Well, I'm off to do the rest of the day.  Israel is about to invade Rafah. They are convinced that Hamas are in Rafah. Along with the hostages I presume. They are total fuckwits. There is no other word for them. The...

Since I haven't done anything regarding my drinking lately, I thought that I should. I have not had a drink since Christmas. I have not bought a drink nor accepted a drink. I have been five and a half months clear. It is a little bit strange and weird. Yesterday at the bar I had a Guinness 0%. I haven't really missed the booze. It hasn't really affected my productivity, but I have loved being completely sober. Not drinking is good for me. What else can I say? I think it is part of getting older. Drink has a very poor effect on you and anyone else who says otherwise is just kidding themselves. Now my cough though, that has been awful. But everyone has been constantly sick. I also have a very mild case of athlete's foot still. But the arthritis in my finger has gone down. I'm going to start running again everyday. I took the last two weeks to recover. I feel ready now. I hoovered the house yesterday. It felt good and I need to do my budget. But all in all it's g...

O Hare's in Newcastle The best fish and chips I have had in ages I have grown to love Newcastle. There is something about the place which brings back such great memories. But also it has really thrived. I just love the place. Yesterday, after talking to Oisin, I began to think more about suffering and the nature of suffering. About ten years ago I pondered deeply why we suffered. I wondered why were we given this capacity to suffer. And here is what I have come up with. We are born through suffering. The mother suffers and the baby suffers. Being squished through the birth canal or taken out through C-section is not a party on any level. We are literally brought suffering into this world. And quite often most religion stops there. Buddhism's solution is to eradicate suffering. Well first the explain it by saying you have done something terrible in your previous life and now you are suffering the consequences. To get rid of suffering you can live the 8-fo...

May May so far... constant coughing. I am so sick and tired of the coughing.  It started up two weeks ago when I was sick and so I'm sick again. But I not coughing during the day. It's only at night I cough. But apart from that... it has been a whole week of May Pole rehearsals. And Forest School. And school school. It has been a whole week of very hard work. I posted on May 1 the last time and I have been wiped every single day after May pole rehearsals. Which is why there have been no posts this week after the 1st. Which was Wednesday. HOWEVER Ghin and I have been catching up loads, treating ourselves to loads of eating outs. We have been to Sakura, Asian Fusion and the Dirty Duck. And we have just been laughing and giggling. It is always laughing and giggling with that child.  I am truly sick again today. I have been sick all year round. I refuse to go to the doctors here because they are so useless. I ...

Effects of too much May Pole... Tá athas orm... Which means Happiness is upon me, ie I am happy in Irish. I told Ghin this yesterday and he said, that sounds like the Game of Thrones language. It is interesting that in Irish, feelings are seen as transient. If you have a feeling, it is upon you - you are not the feeling. The sadness is upon me, you, them whatever. And when you 'have' something, it is 'at you', at me, at them. So Tá leabhar agam - the book is at me. Which makes more sense, because at some stage, later the book will be at someone else. In the past weekend, I attended a seminar about the Threefold Economy - a Steiner thing. The triskillen is often used to illustrate it. As far as i'm concerned it looked a lot like a cooperative although the man who was leading it kept on saying that it was not - associative economics in not a co-operative. OK, whatever dude. But he did say that this Celtic-Ger...