Shiva's and Metta's Mother's Sutra

This week's blackboard drawing As I do more and more about Rome I am certain I must have been Roman in a previous life. Or at least part of the Roman Empire. This is the third week of term. Things have settled down and there's a good energy in the school. I have gotten into a rhythm of sorts and now I can start getting my other bits laid on top of it. So tomorrow I start getting up early. I found the secateurs in the cupboard of the school. I swear sometimes I think the place is infested with gremlins. I also found my dustbuster and a whole lot of cleaning things. And also a poster of all the Roman emperors. Man there were LOADS of them. I think something like fifty. Also I sorted out the cupboard in school. I dusted the cubicles and rescued the cupboard and got it to start working again and I cleaned out the bottom of the sink. I think that I might end up distressing the cupboard. It's varnish is now the worse for wear and either papering it or distressing it ...

Monday again. Wow. Was that really a week? I am totally exhausted. I have been binge watching Netflix and am now paying the price. Watching that amount of TV is really bad. It is much worse than binge reading. My brain feels completely empty. Right I need to sort things out. I am going to do that now. Cooked dinner, laughed a LOT, bought more food, did laundry and then went to bed. Life seems to have settled down greatly. Although this afternoon i was VERY VERY tired. I was so tired in fact that I ended up just not being able to do or think about anything. I tried blogging and nothing came out. I feel load better now. In fact, I feel great. Not high great, just steady great. OK, I feel good. Which is better than great. Over the past few YEARS now, it turns out, I have been looking at many things. First it was the Holy Grail. Then I looked at Atlantis. After that it was the Fourth Dimension. In between I read LOADS about Sacred Geometry, Cymatics, blah blah blah. My conclu...

Until my license comes through I am effectively carless. Yesterday Peter couldnt get us till 9 pm and with Peter you are never sure what time he arrives, so it could be anything between 9 and 11 pm. Oisin, who works until 5.30 pm said, why don't we just take the bus and because I just couldn't hack staying at my mom's until 11 pm waiting, I said, ok, why don't we just try that? But BEFORE that, Ghin and I walked back to my mom's. It has been quite blustery and wet the weather and a downpour took place just before we got back to the house. We were utterly SOAKED, but at least when we got back we were dry. And warm. I have now promised myself that I would do my class prep as soon as I can - i.e. just after I get back from school. This is because I have found that I sleep best when all class prep is done and the longer I put it off after school the more difficult it gets to do. So I class prepped and this took us to 5 pm, where we walked down to get Oisin from Heid...

It is has always made me suspicious of religion and anyone who practises some religion on a regular basis. I notice they don't happen to be great human beings. But that is why they do it. So I have now learnt that if someone is in the process of doing lots of religion and even lots of spirituality, the chances are they are in need of it, and therefore, you can't really expect that they will be in the process of practising what they preach. Essentially they NEED religion. And it is also true for anyone doing anything obsessively - a hobby, an activity, an addiction - you can spot that they are in pain and they need the distraction. And that's ok. I think my problem was taking people at face value. If someone says they are doing zen meditation everyday, five times a day, they could either be really bringing it into their lives OR they are doing it because it keeps them out of trouble. I can understand that now. I am going for my run at 6 am. I now know I MUST come hell an...

If anyone asked me what the most important thing to do in life was for me I would have to say to live my truth in a meaningful way. Inauthenticity and pointlessness are the two worst things that I imagine I would face. This of course brings all sorts of troubles, but no matter, I would much rather be troubled in this manner than to live a life filled with lies and uselessness. Why bother then? Why not just end it all? There has to be not just the how and the what, but also the why? The Why is the most important question to me. And also the most frustrating because after asking the Why sometime, you come up against the veil - the veil where the holiest of holies lives and beyond that you may not pass. I have now understood this. Beyond the veil language and thought and reason all stop and then, there is only connection - or as people have termed it for centuries and millennia - God. Anyway, I can't really complain at all because if there is any problem in my life it is that it is ...

Over the past week there have been so many revelations and so much learning. So this is going to be a long post. I will try and backfill it with photographs after I have posted. First week back Being back in school went very quickly indeed. Sore feet  The first thing I discovered was that my feet got incredibly sore after a day's worth of teaching. At first I hardly noticed it, but by Tuesday, I found that after I fell asleep, took a nap, after school - actually Tuesday was the first day I taught, as I appeared in Court on Monday - I found that my feet were CRIPPLED. Not only were my feet crippled, but my back could not be straightened either. This is a new phenomenon, feeling like I had run ten kilometres without any training, but this time it involved standing. I did ask people about it, but in the end, Heidi said, it is probably because you have been standing all day after not standing for a long time. I looked at my feet on Friday and there were veins popping out of them. ...

Yesterday there was a gathering of friends whom I met through the school. It was a gathering children and adults and now, more and more teenagers. There are now very few babies, when there used to millions. The youngest is now nine years old. The oldest, seventeen. And there is every age in between. We have been through so much together and on our own. Jo was so present too. It still hasn't really sunk in I realise. Not for me anyway since I had been away all summer. I realise that when you have the chance you must tell people and SHOW them that you love them. Once they have passed over, then you would have missed the chance to do it as often as you would have liked. YOU miss the chance. So, always make time for those whom you love and who love you. Everything else can wait. Recently I had two friends who had fallen out and I asked them, If this person died, would you go to their funeral? If you would, just make up. Nothing is worth it really. If you think, nah, can't bring m...

When they say party, they mean party. Always humbled by the good friends I have here. So lucky to be part of this wonderful tribe. Back to school party by Jonny and Anita Beautiful kids Excellent food Good friends Gorgeous colours Mesmerised teenagers Changes and stages Fires Hot dogs Admiration Laughter Tables  Kitchen Chats