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384 - 10.11.26 - Magic

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After almost eight months, and five trans Atlantic trips, and two months of nursing Ma through a tough patch, looking after all the finances and leaving everything behind, for the first time, yesterday, a felt a sense of deep peace as I was walking back from NTUC. I said to myself, as I enjoyed the bright sunlight and the butterflies and the flowers... it is such a beautiful day, nothing is going to spoil this for me, not even atomic war. So yesterday, I did exercises with Ma, cooked. Went shopping. Went to see Joyce. Came back. Did my last round of edits. Then started another drawing. I have loads of adminy things to do today. I'm seeing Deena and Serena tomorrow. In other news, Jensen Huang has been a total pisstake. An utter cliche. He turns out he had been having an affair with this woman who is about the age of his children for around a year and a bit and she may or may not be a Chinese spy. China has come out to say it has nothing to do with them. The woman whose company is b...
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383 - 9.11.26 - Extremes

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There exists two Singapores. One where there is indigent poverty and one where there is just so much wealth it is unimaginable. I was driving to Shangrila to drop off someone when I realised I was on the road which I took the bus when I went to Tak Takut Kids Club. I told the passenger, you cannot imagine how much people struggle and here we are, a conference about philanthropy where people are paying $4,000 a ticket to attend. It's kinda obscene. I said to my sister, there cannot be such terrible wealth sitting beside such abject poverty, society has to be somewhere in the middle. The doctrine that you have to allow the very rich to exist so that everyone else can benefit from them is bollocks. It's nuts. Yesterday was good. I went running, then exercised with Ma. Oh I had breakfast with Jac, I did not finish my prata. I then came back and exercised with Ma. I then did my Duolingo and almost fell asleep... Oisin then asked me to accompany him for breakfast. The food in the mar...
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382 - 8.11.26 - The Miracle of Physiotherapy

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I know that physiotherapy is supposed to be amazing, but it really is. I have started doing sessions with ma two days ago - we do sessions at 8 am, 2 pm and 8 pm - after she has her bath. It has been only two days and she looks so much better. Her movements have improved so much. I am utterly gobsmacked. And most importantly the pain is also gone. Well, it isn't torturing her any longer. She's mostly off her meds and the plasters. I am so pleased. Delighted. I know we will always been supporting her, but its just so good.  Well, what does today bring?  7 am:           Run and stretch 8 am:           Physio I 9 am:           Write and Edit 11 am:         Swim 12 pm:       Tidy desk area and hall 1 pm:          Lunch: Stir fried beef and kailan with fried rice 2 pm:          Physio II 3 pm:  ...
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381 - 6.11.26 - Genocide

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I don't know how many people you have to kills before it is considered a genocide? I really hope that they will come for the assholes. Just let them come.  Here's my post from FB today about Hegseth... Of all the super weird things Trump has done... this has to rank up there. Imagine, entrusting the world's most dangerous toy, the US military, to a total bonehead. This utter know nothing was at the very least embarrassing, at worst the very embodiment of running with knives. Everything he said and did just compounded his idiocy. Which would have been quite funny if it wasn't so awful. From the massacre of the children in Minab to the support of Israel with more weapons of torture and genocide. It would be swift justice if he and Trump would be clept in chains and dragged off to the Hague. Sometimes you have to give them enough rope to hang themselves. Where the Obamas and the Bidens were canny enough to hide behind the wall of artifice and pretence, of diplomacy and cut...
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380 - 5.11.26 - Malaysia

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I loved going on the holiday with Ma and Jac. It was funny and sad and full of memorable times. Ma is getting older so we took everything with us - the toilet seat, the rollater, the trolley. Jac has a very comfortable car and she booked us into a very nice hotel. It was the kind of hotel in which I would have spent much of my life in had I stayed with the government.  BUT the environmental cost is atrocious. Seeing Malaysia go down the same path as Singapore but biggered by about 500 times was so depressing.  I have spent the past hour or so ranting on FB.  About colonialism and the state of development in South East Asia.  I am quite tired actually. After the trip, but it was good to go somewhere else. I don't know how alright the rest of Malaysia is but KL is a strange concrete cyberpunk nightmare. Who knows where it will go? I don't understand why anyone would buy into that idea of development? It's nuts. Ugh. Anyway. I feel a lot less anxious about stuff now - a...
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379 - 2.1..26 - Back to blue skies

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All my life, the club has always been there - all the boys' lives it has always been there. It is a third space which hasn't changed very much and I hope it never changes. Just keep it small and sweet and just enough for everything we need to be doing.  Yesterday I did my usual swim. 10 laps. But I'm so good at this now I'm going to up it to 14 laps. Might as well. So that's find according to Gemini and I'm also doing too many sit ups. I don't know. I love my sit ups. Anyway... I did all my editing yesterday and I have four more stories to edit. The last two are great, the others, I'm working on. It reads good others better others a little more laboured. I must read one to Lianne - see what she thinks.  I have another 40 where that came from.  Just chipping away at it. I love writing. I always have and I am finally doing it. After all these years. It is the right time to do it I think.
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378 - 1.11.26 - And BREATHE

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Booked Ghin's tickets yesterday - that was good. It took me forever to find the right flights. It was a nightmare, but find them I did. Certainly almost twice as expensive as they usually are, but there is a war going on. So, anyway. We got lots of help from various places, especially Pa. BUT I am feeling so good now, so much better.  I have decided that I am not going to do anything for anyone for the time being. I just wanna do stuff for myself. And Ma, of course. I do think that Singapore has a serious mental health issue. According to google it does. But I was saying to Jac that these people tend to have self regulation issues - probably because of anxiety and stress. But how it has been manifested is through oversharing and poor boundary observation. It is a nightmare. Somehow, being unable to calibrate your sense of self.  I said to Jac that I think that it has almost certainly gotten worse. And we talked about Serangoon Gardens and how unique it was in Singapore. That i...
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