Shiva's and Metta's Mother's Sutra

For as long as I can remember I have loved being alone. I have loved being able to read, to walk, to eat on my own. I have often wished I could share something beautiful or a burdensome thought I have had, but really, it is the independence, the pure virginity of the Virgo which is my original state. This is possibly how I have ended up in the strange paths and treks which I have ventured. And I know I am not really alone. Beside me always walks my god. My own personal deity, accompanying me. As I even write this, I feel that it no longer is a deity - the personified sacred as dissipated into the fabric of life, melted as it were, and now fills everything. I will never be alone - it is no longer possible. Everything radiates with a numinous beauty, everything is touched. I cannot see it but I can feel it and it is no less real than the things my senses behold. In other words, I am no longer making these things up. I knew they were there, I perceived them with my imagination, but it is ...

It has been a strange day. Suspended in between things. I went for my run then walking with Jonathan and the boys. They are so cute but so tiny. What a long road he has in front of him, but at the same time, Oisin and Ghin are now older. I miss them so much when they aren't here. It takes me only a day. I enjoy the me time and the freedom, but I miss THEM so much. Spoke to Ma, oh yes, Tien Yi called. It was so nice to speak to him. I made bak kut teh. It was TO DIE FOR. I put loads of garlic and loads of bunga chinker. And all of the ribs. I think that's all. I couldn't find the pepper. The weather was beautiful. I think I'm supposed to go walking with Siobhan today or tomorrow. Can't remember which it is. There was the service of course. I use the service to think about many things. Yesterday I was thinking about Mu and the design for February. I have it now. I watched Stardust. So the days pass right? Soon it will be 2022...  I love writing this blog. There are al...

Holy Night 9 – 2021 January 1-2 – Virgo: DEVOTION: SERVICE Now come the three nights of the crown. Release from the only intellectual, or release of the intellect from its earthly bonds and purposefulness. This is the thrice-holy night, in which the lower ego falls away and only the desire to serve, to devote oneself, remains. Rudolf Steiner’s indications for the Holy Nights given to Herbert Hahn Translation from German by Laura Zanutto 2015 and Mark Willan 2016 Heilige Nacht 1./2.  – Jungfrau Nun folgen die drei Nächte der Krone. Loslösung vom Nur-Intellekt oder die Loslösung des Intellektes von der irdischen Gebundenheit und Zweckhaftigkeit. Es ist die dreimal heilige Nacht, in der das niedere Ich abfällt und nur der Wunsch bleibt, zu dienen, sich hinzugeben. Ninth Contemplation: Kristina Kaine The one who wears the greatest crown is Christ. His crown is woven from his intentions which Steiner expresses as “only the desire to serve, to devote oneself,”. As we focus on the presenc...