Shiva's and Metta's Mother's Sutra

Fire club juggling by Oisin I managed to get the plumbing fixed last night. The plumber came over and sorted it. He was a lot more useful than the ironically named Solv guy who came over and ran off and then told me the next day that nothing could be done. This other guy came over, in the darkness of twilight fixed the leak and then said he'd give us a quote for the boiler. Our boiler needs replaced. I did some hoovering yesterday at my mom's place, got some food, cooked laksa and got the boys to sort out the bins - oh and did dusting. But apart from that i basically just sat and watched the Graham Norton Show, which i detest, but for some reason made me feel better. I really don't know why. It sorta began with, i think watching the Tom Hiddleston interview and then went on from there. By the time it ended, i was watching the Spiderman-2 interview and the X-men Days of Future Past interview. I have actually gone off comics and the whole superhero and Star Wars fran...

Here i am waiting for all those plumbers to call me.... Beckett should have done a play Waiting for Plumber, Eletrician, Builder... It would have been even more futile, depressing and nihilistic. Kurosawa could have made a film about it. It would have made grown samurais weep. Well yesterday, after i tried getting people to look at the leaky ceiling in the kitchen and no one came back to me i felt rather defeated. It is awful being so dependent on other people i think sometimes, especially other people who don't really seem to care. Here i am, stuck in a house with a leaky ceiling, no lights and although, you know i am kinda cool with it, surely to god, they should not be, since this is their work. They are supposed to sort it out. I was really quite depressed so i decided to go to the Asian market and buy stuff which we needed. Like sesame oil and prata. And lengkuas and kunyit. Anyway. I did that and then i thought, sod this, i am going to stay in Ma's house. So we ...

This is tiger habitat that is being destroyed by illegal loggers... taken in 2011 when i was in Jambi province So yesterday i fixed the hoover with the help of the Karcher man in Newtownards and then hoovered the whole house. It was great. I was so happy. The house looks great now. I need to get an eletrician out now to fixed the lights. I was thinking last night that having no lights and no heat meant that i was in bed by silly o'clock. The boys were downstairs by candlelight playing Minecraft and i was up in bed regaling Ghin with stories of my childhood. I used to be able to buy a bowl of curry rice for 40 cents and sweets were like three for five cents. Things like that. So we were kinda talking about things which we never usually talk about. It was really lovely. I thought, i quite like not having the light. And maybe not having heat is not so bad. I mean that is how they did it in the old days didnt they? I have been asked to call the electrician though, so that is the en...

I have designated today cleaning the house day - this includes getting the hoover repaired, finally and also doing the admin - and booking my tickets to London for the following weekend. It is very very cold outside. Very cold. Finally, the heating is not working and the lights in the kitchen are making a strange noise. I am feeling a bit sorry for myself, but that is ok. Not as sorry as i feel for Ghin and Oisin. Which is why i need to clean the place up. Oh yes, we have run out of gas in the cooker. Yes, it never rains. Right. I have lots and lots to do. Gotta get on the case.

My camera is gone i think. Well i know it pretty is much gone. A few days ago the display gave up and now i have no idea if i am taking any good pictures at all. I suppose you could call it chancing your arm photography.... The view from my room I do not know if my camera has taken the photo nor what i have taken - so i don't know if i should repair it or replace it. Either way i am quite upset. Everything seems to be breaking down on me. BUT be that as it may, yesterday i spent the evening in The Narrows, listening to the winner of the Maison aux thingy heritage gardens competition. He is now gardening in Helen's Bay Walled Garden and i think that maybe i may get together with a few people in the area and try and turn our gardens into biodynamic gardens. It could happen. There is a real impulse in the area to warrant a few of us getting together and getting started. Must chat to someone about this... Oh the gorgeous Brent Geese The SILENCE - that is what i ...

Last week my previous life and my present life collided in a completely unexpected way. But first, here are some stunning blackboard paintings by Gabriel, the Class Two teacher. Gabriel is making her way fourth time round as a Class Teacher. There is nothing which Gabriel does not know. I am being totally serious. A blackboard drawing of St Martin by the Class Two teacher, Gabriel Class Two is learning to read in lowercase and join up their writing Amazing stuff. So simple and so effective. Launch of the wildlife crime campaign So in my previous life, i used to be the PR person for the RSPB. During this ten year stint, i worked with the Partnership Against Wildlife Crime as the RPSB was part of that organisation. I remember working with everybody to start this initiative in Northern Ireland. Every other month we would put out a press release about bats or birds or poisoning, something like that. I would try and herd a few conservation cats to get it together. It was g...

We sorta began half term by going to Belfast City by bus.... It was a fine dry evening on Thursday - yes it began on Thursday for us... The epitome of neon noir Cuteness in a coat Brothers Mother and son Being happy Gorgeousness This is the face i most associate with Oisin Joking, happy and easy going And that is just pure Ghin - showboater Strike a pose Ice ice baby Show us your teeth It must be very tedious being my children. This is possibly because i don't do lite. I just don't do it. I don't read chick lit. I cannot read potboilers - i don't do frivolous. I don't do popular culture. Not like wholesale pop culture, but rather the Graham Norton Show kinda pop culture. I find it puerile and pointless. I find it reprehensible when people clap their hands at a stupid thing Graham Norton asks his guests to do. Oh can you shave a balloon? I have a balloon here. Hahahaha.... Clapclapclap.... t...

My goodness, September and October really flew by and now, it is almost half term. So much has taken place and i am beginning to take stock of the coming months, already. Life is bittersweet. I am learning that no matter how hard you try, how hard i try to be good, stuff will happen. Often not of my making and i must be able to say - well, that monkey is not the one on my back. Deal with it as best i can i then get on with it. That is what i need to do. It is really so beautiful this morning. I got up and realised it was Saturday. I had a kopi tiam breakfast and then i facetimed my mom. After that i tried blogging. Often i throw away the first draft of my blog. This time i had to do it three times. Everytime i blogged i felt myself feeling better and better and finally, i was left with the feeling of being good you know. Not the high of oh i am positive, but yeah, i'm solid. I think solid is what i am aiming for. The sunrises these days are so beautiful. They seem to be m...

After a rather long and exhausting week, i lay in bed watching the sunset. The house had collapsed in varying degrees of disorder around me and i was feeling a bit blah. My neck is covered in midge bites and i was thinking to myself why bother? Indeed - why bother. There are so many reasons to NOT bother. Not bother because really, what is the point? And then i thought, this is ridiculous. There is never ANY point. The ENTIRE point is that there IS NO POINT. And then i thought to myself, i need to be positive. There is no point in anything and therefore i need to be positive, feel positive and act positive. And it does not matter what happens ever because if i am not positive, then there will really BE no point. At that moment, a light blub exploded into light (er) in my head and i got up and made myself a cup of tea. I started feeling a whole lot better and now - well... anyway. So i am feeling better. In fact in am feeling a LOT better. It is weird how one's head can be...

The seven seals - when we choose death, not life... Yesterday i was thinking about my blog yesterday because i used the H-word. Which is more disturbing than the F-word. The H word i never ever use because it is without redemption. Unless you change your heart and stop hating. But of course there is something pathetic in trying to continue to love an addict. I mean you can love them, but i think you cannot condone what they do. And if that addict is going around and pushing drugs on other people - in fact bullying them into taking the drugs - then i think there is a point when you have to call it like you see it. Singapore is the addict. It is addicted to this form of growth which demands the destruction of the Earth. And they are not content with a little bit of destruction. No their vision is complete and utter annihilation. There is no negotiation with this mindset. Saying oh i LOVE you, LOVE will heal it - oh dear, you are misguided my dear poppet. No. Make no mistake Singap...

The smaller lattice structure is meant to simulate walking in a lush forest I have decided to more or less give up on Singapore. After the hysteria of SG50 and what's worse the reaction to the haze and their inept handling of so many other things - such as education, mental health, sustainability - i have just decided that having on opinion on it, other than, it is completely pathetic, is a waste of time. All you hear are excuses - oh we can't do this because you know, we are so small. We will have racial riots. Oh because we are like the best in the world and why should we change anything. It is the IGNORANCE which is wedded to the ARROGANCE which is maddening. There is no point in being positive about Singapore. If this is the epitome of human civilisation as we know it, it is tragic and without redemption. The nail in the coffin for me was this SG50 exhibition in Gardens by the Bay, a place built on the proceeds on gambling, which as a symbol says everything. This team...

It is never a good time to start talking about our mistakes... so let me begin with the haze... This, estimated to give BACK to the grid or... this ... does anyone know what the carbon footprint of MBS is? The fucking haze. Oh the fucking haze. It frustrates me sooooo much. The sheer incompetence and stupidity of the governments of ASEAN. Their corruption and self interest. All these years and they could not sort out the issue with the haze and now since the low lying fruit of a burning rain forest is gone and people are now burning and draining peatlands!!!???? so the haze is now getting worse, they then get in on the act - of finger pointing and blaming each other. I can't speak for the Indonesians, but the Singaporeans are soooo annoying. Uh, why can't they share their maps? Uh.... Uh why won't they let us in their air space???? Uh??? Why are the indonesians like that??? Uh???? Singaporeans are placing the blame on the Indonesians when really everyone is imp...

Oisin and Ghin discuss how to make bacon It is alright to feel a bit like i am not managing sometimes. Like, for instance, i am not managing to go for my run everyday. I am not managing to clean the house twice a week. I am not managing to sign up for my riding lessons. I am not managing to feel cheerful 100 per cent of the time. THAT'S OK. Only a psycho feels happy all the time right? What i AM managing to do quite well is do my teaching and the grounds and cook and garden and sleep - and that should really be enough to make me content. I am not a hero. I can't do everything - and that is OK. It is important to know the things which need to be ignored. I am discovering this. Things which i must not take on either. Things which i can do and will do and then after that it is in the lap of the Gods. If something untoward happens, then it is not as if i can do anything about it. I have decided that this is my arc of influence and no more - other people need to ...

We got to Tyrella and this is what we saw... Nothing but sun And sky and sand The beach was WARM! In October! I lay on the sand and felt it flow through my fingers... And took this selfie Here is Ghin his reflective thoughtful best And Oisin his happy confident cocky self Doing a handstand Taking an early Christmas lunch By Clough Castle - in the sun...- DUDE!!!