#65
Yesterdays Nice Thing: Meeting the boat makers of Lough Neagh
I went to Lough Neagh yesterday to see the boat makers there. As I headed to the workshop, I was horrified at the amount of quarrying work which had resulted in a rather unlovely landscape. It very quickly turned out that the people who lived on the banks of Lough Neagh actually didn't own the place. It was owned by Lord Shaftesbury and it was an understandably long running sore point. I was so angry for them. This is our homeland and it has been stolen from us, they said to me. It was taken from us and now we have to pay rent to live on it.
I don't know how they do it. Lord Shaftesbury, from what I can see is not a good guardian of the land. The entire Lough is extremely polluted. It is actually one of the most polluted Loughs in the entirety of Europe. It's good to see the people though trying to take ownership.
So I am going to try and get my class to come and work on it - it would be nice for them to form a connection to another part of Northern Ireland. I think that people here can have a really poor sense of the country they live it - it tends of be very parochial. They could have traveled a good bit of the world and still know nothing about Northern Ireland - Peter is a case in point. I don't think he has ever been to Rathlin Island. Robben Island, sure. Rathlin Island? Nope.
Certainly I don't feel like I really know Northern Ireland anymore since I stopped being in the RSPB. Holywood ain't Norn Iron. It is like a film set of what a thriving town should be. Go to any other town the size of Holywood and the dying on the feet is clear. Even Derry was in critical care, despite having received a recent boost by the Derry Girls TV series. When the boys and I went on the school holidays the streets were empty and there were no shops which we open. It was almost certainly a lot less busy than when I last saw it. When I lived there.
Day Two of Lent. I was so tied when I got home yesterday. I just sat and watched TV for two hours before heading to bed at 9. Then I couldn't sleep. I am so tired, so tired really.
I have started to notice how crazy social media is. It now exists for itself. Reading things on FB, previously FB used to be a tool, but like every media it is now an end to itself.
I am trying, trying to find my way through the exhaustion and the feeling of neverending dread. Wondering if I will ever be able to feel the wonder against my cheek once again. Wondering if I will ever be able to believe. Did I believe previously because I didn't know better? Do I feel like I can't believe anymore because, because I feel like nothing will change. But change always happens - the problem is that it is happening in horrible ways. The uglies are winning. That's how I feel. The ones who have no soul. Who have perfected the art of degradation and horror. The ones who only value money. And for some reason people are entranced by them. They cannot see past their slick masks and money to perceive the horror that lies beneath. They do not see true beauty. They can't. And beauty is dying. It is going out with each passing day. It seems to only exist on FB and social media now. The real world is slipping and fading away. It saddens me. I can't let this happen. There I have said it - the world is fading away. You know what, I will not let that happen. As long as I have a tiny corner of paradise to work with, I will keep the lights burning. And when everything else, should that happen, when everything else fades away, I will still be here, burning my candles and singing my songs. Planting my seeds and drawing my drawings. Reading my stories. Creating the possibilities, until I can't do it anymore.
The onslaught of the bizarre. I was passing one of the houses on the way to Lough Neagh and I remembered when the trees were young and vigorous - now they were straggly and old. It made me realise how much time had passed since I had arrived in Northern Ireland. I still feel like a new person here, but that is hardly true is it?
So, yes, here, singing my songs, looking after the flowers, tending the birds, until the light fades.
I have decided to add one more thing to my task daily - to do something which is caring. To remind myself to keep those lights on.
I went to Lough Neagh yesterday to see the boat makers there. As I headed to the workshop, I was horrified at the amount of quarrying work which had resulted in a rather unlovely landscape. It very quickly turned out that the people who lived on the banks of Lough Neagh actually didn't own the place. It was owned by Lord Shaftesbury and it was an understandably long running sore point. I was so angry for them. This is our homeland and it has been stolen from us, they said to me. It was taken from us and now we have to pay rent to live on it.
I don't know how they do it. Lord Shaftesbury, from what I can see is not a good guardian of the land. The entire Lough is extremely polluted. It is actually one of the most polluted Loughs in the entirety of Europe. It's good to see the people though trying to take ownership.
So I am going to try and get my class to come and work on it - it would be nice for them to form a connection to another part of Northern Ireland. I think that people here can have a really poor sense of the country they live it - it tends of be very parochial. They could have traveled a good bit of the world and still know nothing about Northern Ireland - Peter is a case in point. I don't think he has ever been to Rathlin Island. Robben Island, sure. Rathlin Island? Nope.
Certainly I don't feel like I really know Northern Ireland anymore since I stopped being in the RSPB. Holywood ain't Norn Iron. It is like a film set of what a thriving town should be. Go to any other town the size of Holywood and the dying on the feet is clear. Even Derry was in critical care, despite having received a recent boost by the Derry Girls TV series. When the boys and I went on the school holidays the streets were empty and there were no shops which we open. It was almost certainly a lot less busy than when I last saw it. When I lived there.
Day Two of Lent. I was so tied when I got home yesterday. I just sat and watched TV for two hours before heading to bed at 9. Then I couldn't sleep. I am so tired, so tired really.
I have started to notice how crazy social media is. It now exists for itself. Reading things on FB, previously FB used to be a tool, but like every media it is now an end to itself.
I am trying, trying to find my way through the exhaustion and the feeling of neverending dread. Wondering if I will ever be able to feel the wonder against my cheek once again. Wondering if I will ever be able to believe. Did I believe previously because I didn't know better? Do I feel like I can't believe anymore because, because I feel like nothing will change. But change always happens - the problem is that it is happening in horrible ways. The uglies are winning. That's how I feel. The ones who have no soul. Who have perfected the art of degradation and horror. The ones who only value money. And for some reason people are entranced by them. They cannot see past their slick masks and money to perceive the horror that lies beneath. They do not see true beauty. They can't. And beauty is dying. It is going out with each passing day. It seems to only exist on FB and social media now. The real world is slipping and fading away. It saddens me. I can't let this happen. There I have said it - the world is fading away. You know what, I will not let that happen. As long as I have a tiny corner of paradise to work with, I will keep the lights burning. And when everything else, should that happen, when everything else fades away, I will still be here, burning my candles and singing my songs. Planting my seeds and drawing my drawings. Reading my stories. Creating the possibilities, until I can't do it anymore.
The onslaught of the bizarre. I was passing one of the houses on the way to Lough Neagh and I remembered when the trees were young and vigorous - now they were straggly and old. It made me realise how much time had passed since I had arrived in Northern Ireland. I still feel like a new person here, but that is hardly true is it?
So, yes, here, singing my songs, looking after the flowers, tending the birds, until the light fades.
I have decided to add one more thing to my task daily - to do something which is caring. To remind myself to keep those lights on.
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