Whoops!

Yesterday was a whoops day. I need to stay on track with the 21:3 Intermittent Fast to get to where I want to be - in the next 1.5 weeks. But since I was off for the first time in weeks - yes, really, yesterday was my first time in weeks since I had nothing to do for the day, as it were, cos I still have reports, etc I just ended up crashing on the sofa binge watching Once Upon a Time. It was very interesting - if it was just the fairytales, it would have been cheesy. If it was just the contemporary take on it, it would have been a mediocre soap. But because it was an very interesting contemporary exploration of the archetypes through the lens of early 21st century American culture, it was very interesting. Also WASP culture, and very much WASP. A TV series could never be made like that today - it was SO WHITE. Like unself-awaredly so.

However, coupled with that, my old eating habits returned for one day. It goes something like this:

I felt peckish - not hungry mind you, cos I have not felt hungry for weeks. I cannot explain this. Not the kind of hunger you'd expect from only eating one meal a day. So I ended up having some tomato, cucumber, olive and tuna salad. Very healthy right? I had a whole bowl and said, right that is my meal for the day at 11 am. I will not eat anything until tomorrow.

Did I not eat anything until the next day? Like hell I didn't.

I also ate, one and a half donuts - Ghin had 4 donuts delivered to the house (see previous post), and hadn't eaten 3.5 of them, I hate wasting food and I don't even like donuts, but over the course of 2 hours, I ate 1.5 of them.

One more bowl of tuna salad - this time with oinions and pickles and no tomatoes.

A bottle of wine (yeah, I know - I had bought it the day before and forgot to drink any of it, which tells you how tired I was - by the time I remembered it I couldn't be arsed)

A small bowl of methi siv

Half a chopped up, microwaved chicken breast

I think that's it.

Oh yes, half a pineapple and a mango.

That's it.

I did this over the course of 10 hours. Which is not IF at all. The whole point of IF is that there is no food in the system, no matter how healthy and the body has to draw on its storage.

It is the only eating plan that makes sense.

But even as I was doing this, it was a semi out of body experience. I was watching myself just shovel food into my mouth. Part of my brain was going, what are you doing? You are not hungry. The other part was going but Fooooood, Imma right? It tastes sooooo good.

So I have discovered then that I eat cos I'm bored. I'm bored at home. At the same time I was also very very tired... maybe I just needed to. I dunno.

It's not like I have had off days. I certainly have. But that was the first time I reverted. Luckily I had no cheese, pork ribs, whatever else I would have just happily shoveled away when I get to that state.

Well at least I know now. 

So today I do what I always do - start with coffee - around 3 cups eventually, yes I know it is a lot, but I DON'T CARE. And then go on to be busy.