#186.21 - The boyz

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It is hard to believe how big the boys are. Oisin is now twenty and Ghin is 14. I still see them as about 3 and a half. Time has no meaning. Twenty years in my sons' lives does not feel that long and yet at the same time it is forever. It is the difference between 30 and 50. Which is a lot. And it will be the difference between 50 and 70 which is old in anyone's books.

I quite like being 50 - I always knew I'd enjoy it. It is like finally being on holiday. There is no longer the need to pretend to try and get things done. And there is no effort to be made in understanding things. You just ... do. You get it. You get life. You read it. 

The state of the world now does not make for good reading I have to say. All the nightmares which I have feared are at the point of blossoming. It is hard to understand how deluded and blinded politicians and voters have been by the overwhelming madness which is consumption. These films are made of these ridiculous interiors which speak of so much of sadness. And yet at the same time are seen as cold and desirable. Like the interior of the house in Parasite. I'm afraid that the balance will not be restored through choice. We will be dragged kicking and screaming there. I will miss my blog. Perhaps now it is time to revert back to handwritten things.

Last night I was reminded of my Atlantis project. So I'm returning to that. 

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