3.4.25 - Reentry

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On Sunday we went walking to Ben Crom. I had never been there and it was a revelation. Oisin had wanted to find the hidden waterfall but the Silent Valley was closed. We found an entry at Carrickmore and well - 5 hours later we had journeyed there and back. 

It was also Mother's Day. In the past when we walked along treacherous or difficult places, I would hold the boys. Now they hold me. They helped me down the steep slopes of the mountain and made sure I twist my ankle or fall. 

I was very very tired by the time it was over and by Wednesday I was in full flu mode. I am so very very tired. I did have a wonderful time but it took everything from me. 

I also had time to think about having difficult conversations with parents. Should we bother even? Where does our responsibility end? When does it begin? I really need to know. 

It has really not been easy the last few months, since January actually. It really hasn't. I feel so confused and upset about so many things. There is a transition taking place and I was not quite prepared for it. It feels like I am slightly out of control now.

But writing and running are all good for me. And I need to return to that church of writing, running and tidying. All good. All need to be done.

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