21.4.25 - PTSD

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Social media. Social media is ridiculous. Just the sheer volume alone around social media is a nightmare. Yes, sure you can try and sort it out, but when 5 second clips about a genocide are interspersed with an idiot's trip to 'space' and some ad about a stain remover, you have to ask youself about the amount of time spent on it.

The second PTSD I have had from social media from the Gaza genocide has been awful. I have not had a decent night's sleep since Oct 7. The worst part of it all is that the only thing we CAN do is share the stories. Make people aware of the genocide. To be honest I am just so shocked that people are not more vocal about what is taking place. It's so awful. So awful.

That's the only thing which I'm so upset about. Trump - I will be honest about Trump - I am quite relieved that he is so incompetent. He is either incompetent or a complete genius. I think his rhetoric tells me he is not a genius. Sometimes a role can get larger than it should be - and then literally no one can fill the role because it was not meant to be filled by any singular person. So I think as far as the US is concerned - I actually don't care. Sadly, for the people there. But they must have known it was coming. The rest of the world is going to be ok. They'll sort it amongst themselves. And Israel? This is why I am speaking out all the time. There are some super drunk men in here. I have a very short time left here. Should I just drink it all? I think if I finish that will be five drinks in all. Which is a bottle and a bit...

Anyway... never knew that 3 hours could pass so swiftly...

The PTSD I have touches a few things...

How the world doesn't care

How corrupt leaders are

How white settler colonalism is alive and well

How people would rather sell arms than save little babies

How people who were once persecuted will not just persecute others, but do so gleefully - someone need to study this - also true of mother-in-laws in India who will set their daughters-in-law on fire

How stupid people are - often evil is correlated with being evil and cruel. Truly intelligent people are empathetic - people who just parrot shite are not really intelligent. They end up changing positions depending on what the people they listen to say case in point, Covid.

Finally, the only antidote is building community - and the main aim of these assholes is to destroy solidarity. They know what they are doing. They hate us. They do not want us to be working with each other. Do not be distracted by the latest shite. Just live a just life and you won't have to make huge adjustments when you need to in order to make a point.

Also I am going to embrace chaos whenever it happens from now on. In the past, it was not safe - it just wasn't, but now I am who I am, I am going to be able to embrace chaos, like Joan lighting a cigarette. 

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