Healing

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So the thing which has helped me has been rest. Lots of rest. And lots of pain killers. Just paracetamol and ibuprofen. But also slippery elm and seaweed and finally lots of garlic. No talking. Very little talking. I was lying in bed yesterday, after blogging and writing in my journal. Things which will never see the light of day go in there. It is me at my most honest and I am brutal. For some reason though I felt i REALLY needed to record that my hip pain was due to pulling a muscle and it wasn't a deteriorating condition. For a moment there, for about two days I was really worried it was the beginning of the end - the hip replacement, etc. But as I was putting my worries to rest, I realised what a whinge I was being. It was ridiculous. I am NOT old. I have a good twenty years before I need to start worrying about that shit. ALL OF THAT SHIT. And even if i did worry about that shit, there is no point. It will happen. My task is to look after my body, do the best for it, and to enjoy life as much as possible to always choose the adventure. To never succumb to irrational fears. If i become forgetful and get dementia, so what? If i become invalid and infirm so what? But until that happens, until i develop a chronic illness i have no excuse to be a total idiotic wank.

I love life, I love my body, I love the way I look, why should I ever short change myself? And that is what I am doing by worrying about imponderables. So my next task is to get my fitness levels up once again. To be at home in my body and that means for me getting to be fit and flexible again. And it certainly can be done. My entire life I have always been very fit and I will be damned if i ever give up on that. So when the bronchitis clears up I will just get started again.

I love exercising. The cold air on my face, the perspiration, the feeling afterwards, the flushed skin. It is just a wonderful way of clearing my mind as well. All the cobwebs get blown away. I miss it so much. It is amazing how much exercise is now part of people's lives. When I began doing it thirty years ago people thought I was mad. Only crazy people went running. I was a tomboy, climbing and doing things. But now - now... Right, I have just remembered I have to order a friedge. I am going to do that now.

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