Life...
The past week has been very very busy, as usual. It has been beautifully so though. With the good weather belatedly arriving, school going full tilt, Ghin just making me feel incredibly privileged, the way Oisin makes me feel incredibly privileged, it has been runneth over time.
Last Thursday Marie invited my to see Lisa Hannigan in concert at the Empire. Lisa Hannigan used to sing with Damian Rice on O. She's now solo in her own right and her performance was incredible. It was Bjork meets Purcell, meets Suzanne Vega. It had been ages since i had been to the Empire for a gig. In fact it had been too long. There was a symmetry about it in that the last time i was there i was with Sandra for the Answer. That was in 2005. 2005!!! It seems a lifetime away. It seems like another Stephanie was there. A Stephanie who had believed in swinging from the tops of trees, from vine to vine, swimming in magma. Who wasn't afraid to go wherever a feeling would lead her - and some. Where's that Stephanie now? It seems so strange to think that was what i called life. Living. Still holding on - beliving that holding on would bring me happiness. That attachment was not illusion. And in some ways it isn't illusion.
But these days, i value 'control' more. And when i say control, i mean equanimity. The way nature is always in control. Even in the midst of a hurricane, nature still knows what it's doing. It does what it does, but it never loses the big piture. And only when i have practiced that degree of control, will i be able to 'lose it' like nature. I look forward to that day. Meanwhile, i think i'll be content with the little eddies which i run in.
Sometime last week too, inspired by the book the music of silence, i thought that it would be useful to use the canonnical hours to plan our day. The hours are: Vigils, Lauds, Prime, Terce, Sext, None, Vespers and Compline. It made so much sense to me because the day had seasons, had rhythms. It followed the ebb and flow of life itself. The schedule worked with the day, it was humble in that it didn't try and egotistically force work into a place which perhaps was more suited to reflection. It gave reflection and action their due. It honoured the individual and the community. It asked for assistance from the angels of the hour. And in one day we meditated, through our actions and thoughts, both praising life and respecting death. So how does a late 20th century, early 21st century Singaporean come to have her life influenced by shamanism, monasticism, have family and still have a semblance of life?
These are pictures from the Michalmas play which Class Two did. Class Two is responsible for the plays which the school does this year - their next one will be Martinmas. But i run ahead of myself. This play is of St George and the Dragon and these wonderful creatures pulled it off superbly. They sang two songs, recited a poem and performed. And they did this in front of the whole school. Admittedly the school isn't very large, but still - it is a daunting exercise. But that is the innocence of yuff, perhaps. Whatever it is, none of them had stage fright and the whole thing ran smoothly.
So, i sit here at half three in the morning. I've been working in the kitchen at the school and have unearthed some incredble finds and more pedestrian ones. Items: a pair of fiskars scissors, twine which has already been used for conkering, this being the season of conkers - Peter and Oisin - and Ghin - spent the evening making and playing conkers - a deep fat fryer with fat still in it!!! - and camping stove, a breadmaking machine still in order!!!, toastie machines, a really really good thermos flask which i would have taken home, but restrained myself because it could be used for school trips, nytromorse - in a kitchen!!! - several plates, many of which you'd have paid good money for from Avoca, except these were the real McCoy, many, many, many cloth bags, etc, etc. I'm astounded at the stuff that does get left behind. People are NOT destitute in this part of the world anyways. You can see this from the haul of clothes that gets regularly forgotten through the year. It seems odd that everywhere people are talking about food prices, hunger, poverty, etc, etc... i know things are bad, but HOW bad? In Singapore they have just held the F1 - it seems that yes there is a recession, but by and large everyone is happy and life goes on pretty much as normal there.
Here...
Anyways i have rabbited on enough. It has been a really boring blog, sorry. One of the more interesting things we did this week was go to the Harvest feast at Camphill. I looked out and saw a wonderfully altruistic giving community before me, and that seemed to be the real feast. I know that they have their problems, but in these times where everyone is talking about greed and selfishness, it was a balm, a little circle of hope. Prior to the feast i had called into the Estates team, who had gone to lunch by then. I had been promised some ornamental brassicas and bulbs. It is almost bulb time, imagine! The estates building is located beside the lough. While i see the lough everyday, seeing it is Glencraig gives it a deep beauty borne of its framing by simplicity and plainess. There is no struggle there. Even as the winds whipped coldly across the grey waters, there was no struggle. As i write this i realise how much i do long for the coast - a real coast. A place where i can be alone - and not alone.
At the meal which i had been invited to by Derek Lim, a Singaporean who is now a houseparent in Glencraig, we just chatted about life. Derek i have known since Singapore. Everyone was amazed when i told them that i had known Derek in Singapore, we had both volunteered with AWARE. They smiled and said, the world is very small, shaking their heads with disbelief. What ARE the chances huh?
The last ten years have not been without it's troughs and peaks, and now as i sail in the middle years of my life, i wonder what the next ten will bring. All i know is, as i did say to someone once, as we sailed in a very choppy boat from Rathlin, life brings you to many places, all you can do is say yes or no.
Last Thursday Marie invited my to see Lisa Hannigan in concert at the Empire. Lisa Hannigan used to sing with Damian Rice on O. She's now solo in her own right and her performance was incredible. It was Bjork meets Purcell, meets Suzanne Vega. It had been ages since i had been to the Empire for a gig. In fact it had been too long. There was a symmetry about it in that the last time i was there i was with Sandra for the Answer. That was in 2005. 2005!!! It seems a lifetime away. It seems like another Stephanie was there. A Stephanie who had believed in swinging from the tops of trees, from vine to vine, swimming in magma. Who wasn't afraid to go wherever a feeling would lead her - and some. Where's that Stephanie now? It seems so strange to think that was what i called life. Living. Still holding on - beliving that holding on would bring me happiness. That attachment was not illusion. And in some ways it isn't illusion.
But these days, i value 'control' more. And when i say control, i mean equanimity. The way nature is always in control. Even in the midst of a hurricane, nature still knows what it's doing. It does what it does, but it never loses the big piture. And only when i have practiced that degree of control, will i be able to 'lose it' like nature. I look forward to that day. Meanwhile, i think i'll be content with the little eddies which i run in.
Sometime last week too, inspired by the book the music of silence, i thought that it would be useful to use the canonnical hours to plan our day. The hours are: Vigils, Lauds, Prime, Terce, Sext, None, Vespers and Compline. It made so much sense to me because the day had seasons, had rhythms. It followed the ebb and flow of life itself. The schedule worked with the day, it was humble in that it didn't try and egotistically force work into a place which perhaps was more suited to reflection. It gave reflection and action their due. It honoured the individual and the community. It asked for assistance from the angels of the hour. And in one day we meditated, through our actions and thoughts, both praising life and respecting death. So how does a late 20th century, early 21st century Singaporean come to have her life influenced by shamanism, monasticism, have family and still have a semblance of life?
These are pictures from the Michalmas play which Class Two did. Class Two is responsible for the plays which the school does this year - their next one will be Martinmas. But i run ahead of myself. This play is of St George and the Dragon and these wonderful creatures pulled it off superbly. They sang two songs, recited a poem and performed. And they did this in front of the whole school. Admittedly the school isn't very large, but still - it is a daunting exercise. But that is the innocence of yuff, perhaps. Whatever it is, none of them had stage fright and the whole thing ran smoothly.
So, i sit here at half three in the morning. I've been working in the kitchen at the school and have unearthed some incredble finds and more pedestrian ones. Items: a pair of fiskars scissors, twine which has already been used for conkering, this being the season of conkers - Peter and Oisin - and Ghin - spent the evening making and playing conkers - a deep fat fryer with fat still in it!!! - and camping stove, a breadmaking machine still in order!!!, toastie machines, a really really good thermos flask which i would have taken home, but restrained myself because it could be used for school trips, nytromorse - in a kitchen!!! - several plates, many of which you'd have paid good money for from Avoca, except these were the real McCoy, many, many, many cloth bags, etc, etc. I'm astounded at the stuff that does get left behind. People are NOT destitute in this part of the world anyways. You can see this from the haul of clothes that gets regularly forgotten through the year. It seems odd that everywhere people are talking about food prices, hunger, poverty, etc, etc... i know things are bad, but HOW bad? In Singapore they have just held the F1 - it seems that yes there is a recession, but by and large everyone is happy and life goes on pretty much as normal there.
Here...
Anyways i have rabbited on enough. It has been a really boring blog, sorry. One of the more interesting things we did this week was go to the Harvest feast at Camphill. I looked out and saw a wonderfully altruistic giving community before me, and that seemed to be the real feast. I know that they have their problems, but in these times where everyone is talking about greed and selfishness, it was a balm, a little circle of hope. Prior to the feast i had called into the Estates team, who had gone to lunch by then. I had been promised some ornamental brassicas and bulbs. It is almost bulb time, imagine! The estates building is located beside the lough. While i see the lough everyday, seeing it is Glencraig gives it a deep beauty borne of its framing by simplicity and plainess. There is no struggle there. Even as the winds whipped coldly across the grey waters, there was no struggle. As i write this i realise how much i do long for the coast - a real coast. A place where i can be alone - and not alone.
At the meal which i had been invited to by Derek Lim, a Singaporean who is now a houseparent in Glencraig, we just chatted about life. Derek i have known since Singapore. Everyone was amazed when i told them that i had known Derek in Singapore, we had both volunteered with AWARE. They smiled and said, the world is very small, shaking their heads with disbelief. What ARE the chances huh?
The last ten years have not been without it's troughs and peaks, and now as i sail in the middle years of my life, i wonder what the next ten will bring. All i know is, as i did say to someone once, as we sailed in a very choppy boat from Rathlin, life brings you to many places, all you can do is say yes or no.
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