20.1.26 - 26 - Today

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Looks much better IRL




We have been doing Zarathustra. I have loved this. We are going slow, but then we always go slow. I don't confuse the children. I think the most important thing about Zarathustra is that he began the new idea that there was only one god. And that we fought the battle between good and evil inside ourselves. Not outside. The battle is within. We have to stop blaming other things - externalising the behaviours which we have.

Ghin came over yesterday - I made dinner and we chatted. I drop and collect Oisin from Bannatyne. We live quiet, unremarkable lives, which is great. I love this. Living unremarkably.

It is a blessing to live unremarkably, especially after such stress and trauma. I don't know how I did all that. One foot before the other.

Anyway, I am not doing more than other women have done over the years. I said to Ghin, as we chatted about toxic masculinity, that this has existed since time immemorial. My short story, Silence, is not some far fetched idea about how men regard women. It is about the lust for power and the lack of accountability. Men in positions of power have always been delusional. The Tech Bros are annoyingly UNORIGINAL - that's the whole point. They are so not different from all the assholes in history. They are just pathetic. Zarathustra's exhortation for Good Thoughts, Good Words and Good Deeds have never had any follow through with these people. The only thing has been the voice of Angra Mainyu whispering in their ears, telling them that they are somehow special, elect, different. And how incredibly uneducated they are... listening to even the science bros is painful - they really have no foundation upon which to base their ability to think and argue. It's just awful.

ANYWAY, the conversation with Ghin was illuminating. He said that it was so important to be able to hold a conversation. Many boys of his generation were unable to talk - to speak. To be witty. To hold their own. Neither of my sons have that hang up. For some reason they are able to roll with life's punches. They are able to be who they are meant to be... for now anyways.

Right I must start lesson planning. I did so much prep during the break - I didn't even know it. 


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