20.1.26 - 25 - The self
I'm listening to a review of the Eat, Pray, Love woman's latest book about her life with her lover. It is crazy really that anyone would write a book like this and just unveil the horror of someone who is preying on another person's pain. It's kind a mad.
Totally mad.
So... I need to know what to do next. I have this draft manuscript and I want to get it published. I am unsure what to do next... who will help me. I need to believe in the book and go forward.
And still write... just keep writing.
It is interesting that even, back in the day, when I was with AWARE in my 20s, the idea of the well-meaning white woman - or the Karen - was something much reviled by the NGOs of the 'global South'. I remember people saying these woman, they come in a tell us how to live, not realising that we cannot do this. This is not what we are about.
The women were just seeing themselves as being brave and helpful while the women from the global south saw them as naive and idiotic at best, arrogant and know it alls at worst. Fast forward to now and here we are - Renee Good literally shot in the face for trying to do some good.
It's mad really. What is this world exactly? On the other side, the author of Eat, Pray, Love write about what an asshole she is - cannabalising her friend's death. I really don't read memoirs. Memoirs are all unreliable. Even this blog is unrealiable. The number of times I erased things after I wrote them with tears of frustration. Anyway, who writes an autobiography? It's mad. Who wants to know about your life?
I can't believe this blog is 19 years old. Ghin is 19. Everyday, for 20 years, I wrote about life... well, not everyday... but near enough. In some years, it was only half the year. But I always returned. Always.
Right. Must start prepping for today.
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