3.3.25 - Simple things

Yesterday, forced by Siuban's imminent arrival, I hoovered the house and felt INSTANTLY felt better. I cleaned the kitchen and I began to look at my diary. I had literally forgotten that I NEED to have a clean house to do any work at all. I had left it too long (3 weeks) since I had hoovered. But just doing it reminded myself about this.

That's good, right?

Then I looked at dates and was highly relieved that a) the Easter scheme wasn't round the corner and b) that I had not double booked myself for any dates... 

It was great that Siuban came over and we then talked about mythology. For TWO HOURS. And then Ghin came over and I made dinner - then after that Oisin and Michaela came over. It was sooooo nice. 

Life is good - great, in fact.

I've booked my trip to Singapore. Everything is alright.

I am now able to move on other things as well - like cleaning up the house. Making things right. It was good. I am happy.

Oisin was talking about heading to Singapore in May, which isn't far away. I said to him, have you heard yet? He said, no, but it still looks like its on course for all that. It has to be the longest job interview in the history of job interviews.

I did my lesson plans last night and began learning about the history of the salmon. The Atlantic salmon. I watched it trying to leap up the waterfalls and it was completely insane. Why would an animal do that? Why would it try and have that as a survival strategy? It's just so extreme. Extreme animals. I can't quite believe some of the things which animals go through to survive... and yet they do that. It's kinda mad.

I was thinking about the Old Woman of Beara. And how these stupid people keep talking about older women as dried up an asexual. It's very annoying. 

The sea crawls from the shore

Leaving there

The despicable weed,

A corpse's hair.

In me,

The desolate withdrawing sea.

The Old Man of Kerry am I

Who once was handsome.

Now all I know is how to die.

I'll do it well.

Look at my skin

Stretched tight on the bone.

Where queens have pressed their lips,

The pain, the pain.

I don't hate the women

Who swore the truth was in their lies.

One thing alone I hate–

Men's eyes.

The full moon

Gives its youth to everyone,

Touching everything with silver.

In me, the shadow.

The cold. Yet still a seed

Burns there.

Men love only money now.

But when

I loved, I loved

Young women.

Young women whose laughter made

Many a summer's day

Weaving beauty from the sun.

I loved such women.

And still the sea

Rears and plunges into me,

Shoving, rolling through my head

Images of the drifting dead.

A soldier cries

Pitifully about his plight;

A king fades

Into the shivering night.

Does not every season prove

That the acorn hits the ground?

Have I not known enough of love

To know it's lost as soon as found?

I drank my fill of wine with queens,

Their eyes fixed on my skin.

Now among the stinking shits

I chew the cud of prayer.

Time was the sea

Brought queens as slaves to me.

Now I hear the face of God

And the crab crawls through my blood.

I loved the wine

That thrilled me to my fingertips;

Now the mean wind

Stitches salt into my lips.

The coward sea

Slouches away from me.

Fear brings back the tide

That made me stretch at the side

Of him who'd take me briefly for her groom.

The sea grows smaller, smaller now.

Farther, farther it goes

Leaving me here where the foam dries

On the deserted land,

Dry as my shrunken cock,

As the tongue that presses my lips,

As the veins that break through my hands.