Result!!!

Listening to last.fm.... such a wonderful thing to behold... Six Music and Last.FM

I have sorted Ghin's clothes - actually there's more room than i'd ever imagined. When i decided that ten jumpers and twenty T-shirts should be enough it was easy enough giving or putting away the rest of the stuff.

Many of Ghin's old clothes are also Oisin's old clothes, so it was a double trip down memory lane for me. I saved a few pieces. Pieces which Ma sewed for Oisin when he was up to a year old. Some stuff we got back from Singapore and never used because it was too cold in Northern Ireland, i have packed FOR Singapore this time round, so we won't have to buy any stuff when we get there.

I smelled some clothes - to check if they were clean before i gave them away, and then to smell the boys, because i could smell all those years back.

I sorted through Oisin's cupboard too, and discovered the bag with his clothes from 5 - 6 years old. I made this bag up two years ago, when he was going through into 7 and now he is going in to 9.

I created a new bag - 7 - 8... and my little boys are growing up. Everyday, everytime i look at them, i think, i must love this moment... because one day it will be no more, and i do not ever want to say to myself i never noticed it when they were here. If i died today, i want to make sure i die with no regrets... and so i try to live my life without the fear... or if it is there, to acknowledge it and breach it.

I could say right now, if i died, there would be no regrets, because i have lived my life, given the deck of cards i have been dealt with, quits with my conscience. I would do some things differently, some things i would never have done at all if given the choice again. But, when all has passed, when everything has faded into the distance or come to a juddering halt, i have come to this moment in my life and i cannot say it has not been good.

I have loved, really loved, been really loved, and i have family and friends and two beautiful children. There is nothing to complain about.

If we could have some world peace and sustainable development, a bit of social justice and respect for the old and the young, that would be very nice too.