26.12.24 - On the second day of Christmas...

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Well, i did manage to go for my run today. But by way of work, not much has taken place. 

However, I have roughly planned my day out...

I did start replying to people who sent me messages and whatsapps.

I should do birthday messages after this.

But roughly, I plan to write, transcribe, run and look after Ma and Pa. Then do admin. All the while in my childhood bedroom. It is a true oasis here. The house is beautiful and quiet. So quiet. You can't QUITE believe it is so quiet.

Apart from that i'm just watching the horrors in Gaza and wondering if the first bullet has been fired for the revolution in America. I mean they allow people to print guns, so you know, it's kinda mad.

I am not an advocate of violence, but I also agree that if your back is against the wall, and you have tried to make people see sense for years, then the last resort is - well, it is gonna be violence when you have nothing left to lose. For some reason, if it was Mangione, he felt he either had nothing left to lose or had something to gain. I guess, the Gen Z and Alpha have been constantly told how there's nothing left for them - plus the pandemic - who can blame them?

I missed the boys yesterday, but my heart is always going to be pulled in two parts. It's just the way it always is. Actually this version of Singapore in which I never leave Serangoon Gardens and I never have to deal with the outside world I quite like. It's pretty cool. It's kinda like being in Holywood and just doing stuff.

Today when I was walking back after the shop at my Village, I recalled someone talking to me about operating 'outside their comfort zone'. I honestly did not understand what that meant. What was a comfort zone and what did it mean not wanting to operate outside it? As far as I was concerned, my entire life was about looking forward to operating outside my comfort zone, unless it involved meeting very large life sized cartoon characters come to life. I think that might be more a phobia though, rather than a reluctance to be outside my comfort zone.

But yes, the comfort zone does not exist for me. There boring zone, the inethical zone, the stupid zone, the you are totally wrong zone, yes all those I understand... and am more than happy to operate outside of them... but a comfort zone, that's just mad. Our entire lives are about being outside the comfort zone. The comfort zone is an illusion. Cos there is no such thing as total safety.

I'll answer the birthday messages then I'll start looking at what I should do next and prioritising my work and my art/writing.

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