Leave the rest

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I've just allowed myself to drift over the last week. So tired and fed up and with the period arriving today i'm just feeling a bit crazy. I also feel a bit stuck. Like everything's just flatlining. It's crazy i know. Nothing is different this week. Nothing. Nothing, except...

I need a holiday. I need sometime off. I need to take it easy. Sometimes i don't notice when things are getting on top of me. And sometimes i do take it out on the kids. And Peter. And sometimes i just get a little nuts around this time of the month.

It hasn't been easy, but we have been trying. And it is hard when i see the hope fading sometimes. I wish i had Ma to go to. To just take the kids and go for a drive down to the folks' house. Where i can just let it all hang out. Where the kids will be looked after. Where i can relax and chill and maybe go for a walk on my own.

I just wish that sometimes i'm told this. You take the night off, i'll do the kids.

It ain't easy being a parent.

So tonight i'm semi taking the night off and maybe tomorrow i'm going to just do something nice on my own. Stroll about, have some coffee. Just take time off. Recoup my thoughts. Just renew myself.

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