Sunday, 22 May 2016

The state of my garden

Oh boy oh boy - anyone has a goat to spare?


My garden is a complete and utter overgrown mess. My excuse? The very cold April, and then my parents being here means that I spend a lot of time over at theirs. So my garden is filled with grass and buttercups, but because I know a bit more about gardening, I am not really despairing. Instead, I sort of feel I think I should use this opportunity to have a good look at what is there and work with it, instead of feeling that weed = enemy, I could do, buttercups here is good. Nettles here is good. I could try that.

I should really be cleaning the house and then preparing for school.

Instead, here I am, wasting time, doing this blog. Sigh.

Yesterday was so lovely in Dublin though. Sometimes I think that life is a series of lovelinesses. I know there are tough times in between, but I am getting better at them. I was recently talking to someone, and I said, there needs to be suffering in life. Suffering is like salt in life. Through suffering we learn. This is hard to understand, but it is also true. If I could regard pain as something positive, life would be much easier. And there is no such thing as a life with no pain, if there was no pain, we would be dead. Pain is also a sign that we are alive - getting everything we ever want is overrated. Learning how to set boundaries and keep the centre, that's what it is all about.

I think that is probably my journey for the rest of my life. Some people are born with this capacity - like Oisin for instance, he seems really to have been born with this innate sense of being chilled. Not I. I do not have this - so this is my lesson in life for this life.

Sometimes I think, I really wish I was born with this - I would have save myself quite a lot of pain. But sometimes the cards are stacked against you. I think the Singaporean education system did not help. Till this day I feel really pissed off about it. More pissed off than I should be really. But when suicides take place on a regular basis around the announcement of exam results, then there has to be something not quite right.

Right - time to try and clean the house. Over the past week it has more or less collapsed dreadfully. I must change the sheets, etc. There is sun today - time to do the laundry.

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