Sunday, 20 January 2013

It's magic you know...

I spent the last two days caring for one very sick and one semi sick boy. Ghin's coughing has become much less. Last night he practically did not cough. What can one put this down to? Lots of good food, warmth, mummy's TLC and some herbology. Honey is the main ingredient for making coughs better. Slippery elm is good for sore throats and for people who have o appetites. It has been heck.

However, i have managed to do some thinking. And i have thought...well first, i read a bit from Steiner's Foundations of Human Experience. It is very interesting. It was a course Steiner did for teachers in the first Waldorf school. It looks at how we are made up and what we as teachers do - what we need to do. Chapter Ten i read almost a year ago in Dundonald Hospital while waiting for Ghin to have his head seen to. It talks about our bodies as being part of the cosmos. The head being a little bit in it, but our bodies and limbs being a lot in it. We can't see most of our presence here Steiner says because we can't see the soul or spirit. But it lives mostlyin in our limbs and bodies.

This is very interesting to me because of course lately i have been looking at doing what they call gross motor skills and what are gross motor skills but this very active use of the limbs, i.e. spirit - when we work physically Steiner says we are bathed in the spirit and this is something whch people who have jobs which have them do physically repetitive by crafty things like chopping wood, or blacksmiting can testify to. have felt it too - that we are just tingling with spirit. It needs to be work with a purpose though, very important. And work with dignity, not like slave labour on a galley ship.

Anyway, it made me think anew about learning things physically. Especially if the best way to engage children is through feeling and willing - thinking does indeed have to take its place...and patience is also required. Pateince which requires great inner courage from teachers because you need to TRUST that the work you are doing is working. It is FAITH. Anyway, this makes me think i might do Foundations from my thesis - of course this is an insane idea, but it will make much of what Steiner has lectured about real...i dont know where i am going to find the time to do this now...

Part II

The other thing that has come to me being at home and doing domestic types things is this: lately i've been feeling unsettled - see posts from last week - mostly because of someone else. Too long and omplicated to explain, however, i have decided, based on what a great year 2012 was and on the really good year i am actually having so far two things:

I AM HAPPY. Honestly i am. i am really happy with EVERYTHING in my life. It is a bit irregular and quirky, but hey that's life right.

I KNOW WHAT I WANT TO DO. which is more than i can say for myself ten years ago. I know the following: for the next seven years i am going to be a class teacher. My sabbatical will consist of visiting India and China. I will in between that look after the boys and make this a lovely home. I will do up the house, have a great garden, etc, etc. I will see bits of Europe which i haven't seen before - and Ireland. I'm planning a trip to the Skelligs in the summer. Couple of astrological/archeological/mythological sites. I'm drawing and playing the piano and running while i'm doing all this. Seeing gigs, being with friends etc. Cooking, crafting... In all it will be a great another seven years of quite contentment and productivity. Abject poverty, sure, but what the heck.

After India and China i will probably do another eight years of class teaching. Then i will join the Greenpeace anti-whaling fleet and throw myself between Japanese/Norwegian tankers and have a great time. I will probably be dead by 65, which sounds young, but really, i think i know when it will be time to call it a day. That's ok. If i'm not dead by 65, i'll have time to do more of the same.

But seriously, i know what i want to do. Most importantly i am living my life with some degree of honesty. It is great. I won't have it any other way. We make a few compromises here and there, but by and large it's great. I am deliriously happy. Being creative, being able to love and filling every minute of my day with love, it is a deep deep previlege which i am blessed with.

So the lesson from January this year thus far is: be happy it is a choice, do not hitch or meausre your happiness by other people, be empathetic, but not dependent and always be crative. Everyone is crative in some way - grow, grow grow. We have only one choice, grow or die.

This was a real piece of learning to me. So i think that 2013 is now going to be better than 2012. It's a great feeling. In fact, its magic, you know...

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